Standards and How Quickly They Change

I have had this post "written" in my head for some time, but I have not had much time to write it. Working 7/12 with conference calls every evening after 7 pm (it is during normal working hours back in the states) makes it hard to squeeze in time to write.

I had a number of people back in the states tell me they could not do this because of (pick your reason and insert here.) What I have found in my varied lifestyle is how quickly you can adapt to any situation if you choose to do so, you just have to let your standards slip. Kinda like the ugly guy who can not get a date: lower your standards, dude, you will get a date!

I used to enjoy taking showers where 1) I had some measure of privacy, 2) could control the water temperature and flow, 3) and I did not freeze my a*s off when I stepped out into a tent to dry off and shave. Standards most of us live by and have gotten used to. Umm, not here in good ole' Afghanistan! All three of the standards above I have had to let slip in the interest of cleanliness and to keep my tent mates from "convincing" me of the need to take a shower!

Sleeping arrangements: Yeah, I used to enjoy sleeping in my own bed, plenty of room, fluffy pillows my significant other had on the bed, adjusting the ambient temperature to a degree more conducive to sleeping. Oh, and most importantly, the area around my bed was CLEAN.

You can pretty much toss everything above out the window. I have a lower bunk, my crap is tossed on the bunk above (no dresser,) I had to put a board beneath my mattress to give me some degree of support, and I am a happy camper when I can sweep the rocks and dirt away from where I put my feet at just prior to hopping into bed. And don't forget to wipe your feet or you will be sleeping with rocks in your bed! Ain't life grand!

Eating arrangements: Bet you think I am gonna talk about the quality of the food, huh? Nope, that goes without saying. I remember in the grand old days when I sat at a table, with silverware made of something other than plastic, real glasses, and oh, yeah the food was hot!. And if I wanted, I could drive to any number of restaurants and grab something to eat. Everything listed here is not happening at the dining facility I eat at in Kandahar. None of it. We eat in a tent (of freaking course, what else would you expect?) and sit at picnic tables with plastic water bottles (the water here is not safe to drink) and plastic knives and forks. Yeah, it blows

And to let you know how low my standards have dropped, we have started a tradition of "eating out" on Fridays (the line at the d-fac is stupid long 'cause it is steak and seafood night) and we order either Burger King or Pizza Hut (your only two choices) and have it delivered to the tent by a dude on a moped. I sit on the side of my bunk and eat my whopper (the only other choice is chicken) and two thoughts come to mind: First, this food is pretty good, and second my standards have really slipped if I consider this to be the highlight of my week!

And I also wonder how I can get the food delivered to my tent, but I can not get indoor plumbing???

Some days I feel like the guy in The Shawshank Redemption: I used to have a pretty good life! The only advantage I have (if you have seen the movie) is it won't take me years to cut a hole in the side of my tent to get out!

Having said all that to say this; I eat every day, I take a shower every morning, and I sleep every night. Let your standards slip, you will be surprised at what you can adjust to.

Personalities and their quirks

I have been trying to think of a way to write this post. I look at the group of people that have come to make up the place where I work. They are a very diverse and unique group with personalities that I am not sure would be "acceptable"in the States in a corporate environment, or for that matter, any social gathering! And remember, unlike the military, they can quit (and get fired of course) so it does change the rules somewhat. And most are on at least their second deployment so take that for what it is worth.

But somehow, they have all gelled to produce a site that is pretty fun to work at, and more importantly, get the job done. With a 7 day a week, 12 hour a day (in reality 24) job for a solid year, it is hard to stay motivated. So as a manager, I know there are things and issues I stand firm on, and others I just laugh about. And trust, me I laugh about a lot!

I have given some thought to what it takes to survive out here, and what kind of person "fits in" and won't crack under the constant work load and very little opportunity for any type of diversion. I think they have to be slightly off kilter, able to work independently, and have a hell of a work ethic, is a given.

You can forget any type of corporate look as well. Hair styles run from "normal' (whatever normal is) to pony tails to mohawks. And you can not consider yourself "welcomed" into the team until you get the port-o-potty treatment. There is no indoor plumbing here, so when you are on the port-o-potty, I gurantee you will get the rock (sometimes several) thrown at the side of the can. Yeah, loud as rifle shot and you are never expecting it. It literally scares the sh*t out of you. Or, you have one of my supervisors throw a rock, watch it curve, and hear, "no, not the truck" as it goes through the rear window of what used to be my truck. We switched vehicles after that little incident.

It helps, but is not mandatory, to be ex-military because you have probably already deployed and you are used to "this" whatever "this" may be. But I have people with no military background who are fitting in quite nicely so it is certainly not a "must."

Some use different methods to "fit in." A sense of a humor is absolute necessity. Without one, you will crack or quit, I am absolutely positive of that. Everyone has a weakness, and here, they will exploit your weakness so without a sense of humor (and revenge!) you will have a very hard time.

As soon as the group found out one person had a fear of clowns (yeah, clowns) it was game on and clown stuff is popping up everywhere at work. But, realize that this is the same guy that was putting fake snakes in people's drawers , etc so turn about is fair play.

I have a 50 something Puerto Rican grandpa who has two gold earrings, a "do-rag" wears shorts that are not quite shorts and not quite pants, plays Latin music at full volume and drinks "near beer" since alcohol l is not allowed. The first time I saw him at the tent and he said "Jefe (Spanish for boss) have a beer" with the look I described above, I thought "when in the hell did I walk into the barrio?"

But, when I can understand him, he is pretty fun to talk to and the best I have seen at scrounging stuff to make the site work. He tells me he has the "Puerto Rican connection." I don't care as long as I get what I need to continue to make the site work. If I did not turn a blind eye to the methods used to "acquire" what we need, nothing would get done.

With 30 plus people (and growing) I could (and might) write a book about my team and their various quirks that keep them sane. Most are married, and many with children, so they each deal with that in their own way. Some talk to each other, some "compartmentalize" as a coping method.

As I have learned my team and discovered what makes each one "tick' and what it takes to make them happy and working, it has been a blast! It sucks being away, but the job (and the people) never gets boring!

More Thoughts of Kandahar

I have a couple of other thoughts about the place I am residing at for the next 10 months or so.

Driving: I actually have several points to make.

1) The speed limit everywhere on base is 20km (12 mph.) And the cops actually use radar! Do you know how hard it is to drive 12 mph? You can barely get your truck out of first gear! Sometimes, late at night, I go crazy and creep up to 30km (18mph) and when the moon is full, I shift into third and hit 40km (25mph!) Nothing like living life on the edge!
2) The speed limit needs to be that slow. Some people are stupid, and walk out in front of you, and some people (this is a NATO base) were not born behind the wheel of a car like an American, and it shows! And don't get me started about Jingle trucks and their Afghan drivers who are all over this base...

Communication:

1) I have a cell and it works (sometimes.) As I drove around my lot in circles late last night (the time zone issue blows) trying to find the signal to call into my conference call, it hit me: This is a pain in the a*s! But it does beat the olden days when you, you know, wrote letters and stood in line to use the phone and crazy stuff like that.
2) THANK GOD for the Internet and email! You can still keep in touch with your family and find out the latest dumb a*s stuff coming out of the puzzle palace in Wash DC.
3) Texting always works. Not sure why, but I can always text, even when I can not get a voice call. I have become quite proficient at the art of texting. I am trying to give my brother-in-law's daughter a run for her money when I get home!

Living conditions:
Tent living sucks, tent showers suck, standing in line to eat sucks. I walk on rocks all day, and I never thought I would live to see the day when I could not wait to walk on concrete, let alone grass!

Other than that, this place is the garden spot of the mid-east! I am really trying to find out what the Russians were trying to accomplish when they invaded this country (I am SURE you knew that fact, if not, watch Charlie Wilson's War,) which started the whole chain of events that led to me being over here...

LMAO

I can not find words to describe just how funny I think this is! Skirts for men

Umm, maybe I can! Funny, Stupid, Retarded looking, and more importantly, a complete waste of time and money for the idiots who think any man (well, most) would wear a skirt.

Well, I guess that is all I can say about this subject!

Impressions of Kandahar

After a couple of months here in Kandahar, Afghanistan I have some thoughts.

1) No clouds. Unless it is raining, there are no clouds in the sky. Just bright, blue sky. It is kind of nice.

2) When it rains, the dirt here turns to a funny type of mud. It almost looks like grease, and it is just as slippery. And it takes a LONG time to dry out.

3) No trees. I mean, none. Anywhere. We are surrounded by mountains, and there is no foliage to be seen anywhere.

4) Rugged mountains. You can see them since the airport (where we are at) sits in a valley. It is kind of cool, but you really need trees.

5) Cold mornings, cold evenings, warm days. I guess that is typical of the high desert (we are at 3300 feet in elevation.) Layering is a must. I am going to guess that the summer will be brutally hot when it finally hits.

Not quite what I expected, but not as bad as I thought it might be. If the country was not at war, I might consider... Nah, no way I would live here regardless! No Tigers and no Red Wings!

I attached a pic of the area outside the back part of my lot.

New Years Day

New Years Day. I could not imagine one year ago today that I would finish 2009 and start 2010 in Kandahar, Afghanistan. Who'd thunk it?

As I finish up the holiday season, a few thoughts come to mind. First, I am glad the holidays are over with. Despite every attempt to make the holidays more "homelike" it really only reinforces the fact that you are not at home. Now we can get back to just getting through each day and getting one day closer to coming home and either "turn and burn" and come back for a second year, or look for a position stateside.

Second, I am glad to be working in the field I am working in. It beats the alternative. The economy, despite PBO's (President Barrack Obama) attempt to spend my grand children's inheritance trying to jump start the economy, is SLOWLY showing signs of life. The economy is coming out of recession, but there ain't too many companies hiring. Better to work your scared-to-death employees that much harder then to hire, I guess.

Well, looking back over the last year, and the struggles my family and I went through, I guess the bad outweighs the good, at least for now.

Happy New Year

Life in the "D"

Yeah, I know Detroit has a crappy reputation throughout the US, as if it is the only city that has abandoned buildings, and crime (I have seen Tacoma, so any West Coasters from that area should not be so hypocritical) but it does not help when the only news I see is this:

3 people, killed 1 wounded after Detroit shootout

I would bet your last dollar that something good happened in Detroit, and something bad happened somewhere else (your city) but somehow that never makes it in the news.

The best part of the story? The gunmen "fled in a Dodge Avenger." I have driven a Dodge Avenger. You ain't "fleeing" anywhere in that thing!